what happened? i think my new self ate my old self!

     so this is what i looked like starting college...can you believe it?! even then, like most young women, i wasn't happy with my body. i was always more curvy and athletic than most other girls, but man what i wouldn't give to look like that again! 

     since the start of college in 2005 i've gained around 80 pounds. 80. that's like an 8 with a 0 after it. so much for freshman 15 huh? i guess i turned it into a freshman 15, sophomore 15, junior 15, senior 15! 

     i've also been in a wonderful relationship for almost 3 years and when i'm comfortable with someone, i forget about watching my figure. so since i started dating my darling i've gained about 40 pounds. who knew love was so grand?!

     anyway, what brought this on was channel surfing and landing on vh1's "40 most slim downed celebs." i was like man, i always say i need to start doing something about my weight because although i think i'm beautiful, i'm not happy. 

     so what do i do? i really have no will power when it comes to food. i've always, ALWAYS eaten whatever i wanted. i remember i'd have a lunch packed in high school and eat all of it and then proceed to go get a large fry with 2 rolls and bar-b-q sauce (the sauce was made from scratch in our cafeteria and it was to die for). well if you've ever met me, you know i'm one of the pickiest eaters. i love carbs. i love starch. i love sweets. despite popular belief, i have expanded my horizons since high school. i started eating and liking salad. i also eat more chicken. i've never really cared for any sort of meat besides maybe a hot dog, so this is a revelation. 

      so i'll start trying to make more wise decisions when it comes to food. that can be resolution number 1.

     this is what i look like now. i'm not hard on the eyes, but i don't feel good about how i've let myself go. so what happened if i ate what i wanted then and still eat what i want now? well, i did dance for 14 years, cheerleading for 5 and had a membership at the ymca. i used to love exercise. now i think i've gotten to the point that i feel like i look ridiculous if i try to. "i'm just too fat," i tell myself, "no one wants to see a fat girl exercising."

     well news flash kara, GET OVER IT. quit complaining and making excuses and take life by the reins. nothing's ever going to just change on it's own.

     so i'll start making an effort to exercise. that's resolution number 2.

      now...i mentioned i'm in this wonderful loving relationship. i know alex loves me no matter what, but right now he's got a whole lot to love and we'd both be happier living a healthier lifestyle. i know we're going to get married one day and like all other women, i do not want to be a fat bride. i see us getting married in the next year or two so now is the time to take action. hey, maybe i'd get a ring if i have a skinnier finger to put it on, lol :)

     so include others in my new lifestyle and use the support as motivation. that makes resolution number 3. 

     

     moving right along...after this wedding business...we're going to have kids one day; probably about 5 or so years from now. i need to be fit for my children. i need to be healthy to even have kids in the first place. 

     there's so many health issues in my family. diabetes, heart disease, cancer, high blood pressure, high cholesterol, etc! well you think those factors lurking around the corner would whip my butt in gear. and you're right. i'm healthy now, but if i keep up my current lifestyle there's no way i'll make it without suffering from one, some, or all of these.

     i love my mom, but i have to break this cycle. she never wanted me to be this way. she lived her whole life being overweight and didn't want me to know what it was like. so i'm approaching 24 and i have to make the change NOW. i'm young and i can do it!

     so i will break the cycle and be a healthy example for my family now and in the future. definitely resolution number 4.

     alright, well that gives me some plans to put into motion! if you too are overweight or maybe you just want to make yourself a better you, join me in keeping the faith and fighting for what you want and what you deserve.

Hello Lover

HI! it's me again :)

Sooooo it's almost July now and this will be my last hot summer in the grand state of Texas (as far as I know)! Alex, Dakota & I are moving to Charlotte, NC in August and I'm so thrilled! No real reason for the big change besides wanting a big change. I know, doesn't really sound like me and I still have people constantly asking me "are you REALLY moving?" The answer is YES! I graduated over a year ago now and have been working as the assistant manager for Avenue since the end of July. I just want to explore a new place and new opportunities. I'm only 23 years young, not married, no kids, and no awesome job in the field I wish to be in....so why not uproot my entire life and try something new?! I'm afraid if I don't do it now it'll never happen. Carpe diem!

The perks of moving to Charlotte:
1. we can be only a few hours away from Alex's family
2. I have an aunt that lives there
3. that aunt may be able to get me some sort of job at the Charlotte Observer since she, at one time, was a head hancho for them
4. Alex predominately grew up there so he knows the area
5. it's beautiful! I fell in love when I visited during Christmas 09
6. I get to visit surrounding areas, which are places I've never been! ie Virgina, Washington DC, South Carolina, beautiful beaches

Charlotte's downfall(s):
1. away from my family
2. away from everyone else I know

But I plan on actually making an effort to form friendships there. I haven't done so well with keeping up with the ones here. It's so funny thinking about it...in college my best friend lived a couple blocks away but I always seemed "too busy" to do anything and now my friends live in places like Tyler and Dallas and Fort Worth and Austin. I definitely have to make the effort to see them before I move. Not that I'll never be back in Texas, but I'd definitely rather drive 4 hours instead of 24. Anyway, the point is I need to be a better friend. And in a lot of ways this moving will be a fresh start. A clean slate. No one knows me. That's exciting!

Well, I guess that's enough of an update for now. Less than 2 more weeks of work left then I need to get packing....

hey, remember me?

HI! so post graduation life is stressful and busy!

First, Alex & I vacationed to Florida for a week--which was a blast!

Then, I found a job working for Kingsland Blvd Animal Clinic...
Then, I found ANOTHER job working for Avenue.

Yay, 2 jobs is...a lot of fun? :| I'm excited to be working and making money to pay bills like a real person. Hopefully it'll get narrowed down to 1 soon. Avenue wants to make me the Assistant Manager but I haven't been presented the offer yet as far as salary goes.

Alex & I signed a lease on our first house together on Monday and the house is ours as of Friday! Moving isn't too fun but I'm so excited to have such an amazing house with such an amazing man :)

My mom's having surgery next week. I hope everything goes smoothly and she's up and running again in no time with minimal back and hip pain. Surgery can be a scary thing and it's even scarier knowing I can't be there to take care of her as much as I would like with living an hour away and working 2 jobs, but I'll do what I can! Love you Mom.

pitty party for 1, please

howdy! so i've had a terrible, awful, no good, very bad week so far...and it's only Tuesday! lol...oh well.

everything bad has been happening, so i know good things are coming my way soon.

on Sunday we had a short rehearsal before my theatre performance...apparently there was a screw sticking up out of the floor that gashed my leg open & i bled everywhere...fun

on Monday i got hit by a lady pulling out of an ordering stall at Sonic. then when i got home with my food, i smashed my toe underneath a leg of my bed.

today i realized a local establishment charged my credit card with an amount that is not mine AND the lovely ladies who were supposed to be taking over my apartment lease backed out. backed out 4 days before they were supposed to move in.

so fun, fun, fun! hopefully this just means i'm gonna ace all my last finals and have an awesome graduation and move. and maybe, just maybe, get a stellar job after Alex and i vacation!

anyway, i can't change the things that have happened so far this week, but i will keep smiling and hope that it ends well :)

1 week till graduation!

i graduate next saturday!!! i'm super excited, but i don't think i'll realize i'm done with school until it's the end of august when i would normally head back for the fall semester. well, and hopefully by that time i'll have some super cool, awesome, fantastic job.

i'm really excited to move in with my best friend & my wonderful dog :)

threats

so, if you haven't heard...

yesterday there were signs found in the early morning hours around campus and at my apartment complex. they read as follows:

"10 people will be shot & killed today at -----" -at my apartment complex
"a shooting will occur today and students will DIE" -on campus

i found out about the threats on my way to my first class at 9:30 when my best friend called me. i got a chill and my eyes started to tear. you can only imagine looking over your shoulder every where you go.

the threats were made on the 2nd anniversary of virginia tech and apparently monday marks the anniversary of columbine. scary.

what bothered me most about this was besides the police, rangers, fbi, etc that were swarming the school, i seemed to be the only one concerned. people in my classes were saying things like "oh please, there were threats made every day at my high school." okay, well i've never been anywhere where there was a threat..and HELLO, it's a THREAT!

i'm very glad to be alive. and i'm very glad for my friends and family. i love you all!

so far they've had a couple of leads, but found nothing. i hope they can confirm it was a prank soon so i can rest easy. i don't want any tragedies. AND i'm only 29 days from graduation. now i can't wish to get out of here fast enough!

keep me in your prayers.

hippity hoppity, easter's on it's way

so i'm really excited to head back to my homes wednesday. i say homes because i'm spending the weekdays at my mom's and weekend at alex's. the agenda? well...

• relaxing
• probably packing some things up from my mom's either to sell in a garage sale or move over to alex's
• dog races on thursday...haven't been since i've been legal
• nick time
• sunday brunch with my family & alex -which includes game time!
• i'd really like to dye some eggs :)

it's going to be a nice week. hopefully i won't spend too much time thinking about all the work that lies ahead when i return. lots of projects and finals and work. i've put together a women's health awareness week for april 20-24 and now the psych club would like me to organize a violence awareness event for the proceeding week. i decided i'd make a really great event coordinator. what do you think?

i'm going to be one of those people who really appreciates their job; whatever it is. i'm not the type of person to do work that i'm not proud of. i'm just curious as to where the chips will really fall. as of today, pr people usually start out making around $52,000. if i'm just an administrative assistant, i'd make around $30,000, but if i specialize in public affairs or human resources they generally make $56,000. if i'm a pr manager, they make $82,000, directors make on average $126,000 & executives bank about $170,000! i know i'll have to start at the bottom and work my way up the ladder, but in the end i'd really like to own my own pr firm. we'll see i guess.

anyway, happy early easter! i hope the easter bunny brings you lots of good things.

here's to another fabulous weekend!

so alex & dakota just left. which means I'M left to work and prepare for class this week. actually, i can't really call it a week because i just have one class tomorrow and 4 on tuesday, then i'm off for easter until next tuesday!

so we had a fun weekend. went bowling, went to the park several times, played with the dog, played frisbee & ps2 games, went to see a play, and rented 2 awesome movies. a very fun-filled weekend i'd say :)

41 days until i graduate...and move in with him! & 54 days until vacation! then...we'll see what the real world has in store for me...yikes :| lol

i only have 10 days of class left....ever. wow, i apparently like to count things :) it may not be ever. i was discussing with alex yesterday that i'd go to grad school if my job wanted me to/wanted to pay for it. i'd honestly like to have my masters or phd, but i don't think i would voluntarily stick around for more school right now. we'll see. my name with a "dr" in front if it would be very exciting! but then again, i don't need a doctorate for public relations.

anyway, it was a very relaxing weekend. i'm always sad to see them go though. but in 41 days neither of us will have to see the other go. now that's a nice thought :)

long time, no speak!

well hello there! today was the first day of my last semester of school. ever. it's really hard to imagine. actually, i don't have classes till tomorrow, but i had auditions today for theatre and they were so much fun! call backs are tomorrow & i have my fingers crossed!!

so christmas and new years was amazing. alex is the best boyfriend! i got everything i could ever ask for ..including a LOVELY diamond ring for our one year anniversary. but of course, it's not about the presents. i got to spend a lot of time with the people i love. i got to spend a week with alex's family and i took trips to san marcos, san antonio and san angelo...HA, the "sans"! i didn't get a lot accomplished, but that's okay. i relaxed and enjoyed every minute of it.

((i hope i get cast!!!))

Double Deuce!

I'm 22 today, hooray!

Alex & Nick made my birthday really special this year :) They made the drive up and decorated my apt! Alex even bought gifts for Dakota (his/our dog) to give me, lol. It was precious. When I got a card that said "mommy," I was like "what is this?" lol!

Anyway, I love all my wonderful friends & my super amazing boyfriend :0)

Happy birthday to me!

1 week till my birthday!!

I turn 22 next Monday!

It will be pretty close to my 21st. See, I didn't have your standard "get wasted 21st," I had what I like to call the "classy 21st." I went out to dinner with friends and had a couple drinks then went home and watched a movie with them.

This year we're going to my favorite restaurant then heading back to the apartment for some games & a lil drinking ;)

22. Hopefully it will be a good year! 21 wasn't so hot actually. I broke my ankle, discovered I have some strange allergy, my grandmother passed away, and..I made a lot of self discoveries. But hey, I met my wonderful man-friend!! (Our 10 month is tomorrow...my longest relationship with no breakups, lol)

Tomorrow's election day. I voted early. It was my first time. I don't think I really got to experience it in all it's glory by voting on campus. By I did it, nonetheless! Obama, of course, was my selection for presidency. Not that I like him. I don't like either candidate. But I am more democratic so I side with a lot of Obama's policies and plans. McCain was a really good looking young man, though. I'll give him that. If nothing else it was worth voting for Obama just for the simple fact I think the world would fall apart if something happened to McCain and Palin became Chief of State. Can you imagine a hockey mom as president? Like Matt Damon said in an interview, "it would be a bad Disney movie"!

Anyway, I hope I have a good birthday celebration Saturday. Alex & Nick will both be here! Yay!

gross gross GROSS!

so, i just had a quiz in my 1 p.m. class that i didn't know about...i probably didn't know about it because i was distracted in wednesday's class!

why was i distracted???

because some 19-year-old young man was picking his nose! who does this in public?! go to the bathroom and get some tissue! and not just a casual pick, it was a i'm-digging-deep pick.

now, not only was he picking his nose, this guy was inspecting his findings, then EATING them! i am just totally baffled by anyone that can do this. you learn by the age of what, 5, that that is not acceptable behavior. and this guy wasn't picking them then going "man, i have no place to put this," but it was rather he really was picking them to eat. like he enjoyed the taste of boogars. wow.

so i hope i've disgusted you enough for one day. please don't eat your boogars. and please don't pick your nose around me. thanks!

...i hope i did okay on my quiz...

the extinction of the most beautiful creature

so i believe it was today or yesterday that i was in a class and someone casually told me, "did you know redheads are going to be extinct soon?"

my response was, "yeah, ok. people come up with the darndest stuff. how is that even possible?"

apparently, it's true. by the year 2100, all redheads will be extinct. so we only have 91ish more years! how awful!

so...this makes me wonder....

if people know this information, are they going to put us on display at a zoo so all the blondes and brunettes can admire us? or are they going to create a preserve where we all live together and make little redheaded babies?

ha, i recently saw the movie blindness and loved it...everyone was blind except Julianne Moore's character (which they made BLONDE) ..so what if i was the last red head, ever? no more pale skin and freckles. no more beautiful hair that reminds me of a sunset. gosh, what would men do, such as my boyfriend, that melt over redheads??

i know i will be long gone before 2100, but please don't let "my people" go extinct!
..but i'm sure some miracle redhead-saving drug will be created before that ;)

It's SHHHOWTIME! (& a lesson for all)

Hola!

So i'm finally in a theatre production this semester!!

I play the role of Miss Watson, a 50ish-year-old Bible thumper and caretaker of Huckleberry Finn in the musical Big River: The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn! (It's a small part, but I get to be in the whole play as ensemble...p.s. there isn't really a major role for a female in the play)

I had my first fitting today! It is so exciting to have people make clothes for you...and design your makeup and hair! It's probably the best/be the best experience ever..i totally want to be an actress all my life...if i had that choice :)


It takes the stage November 18-22 & we have rehearsal every single day and night until then, but it is so worth it. It's the part of my day i look forward to. Everyone come see it!

So in other news, my job is going well. I'm an intern for Planned Parenthood and am an advocate on my campus to promote sex education, safe sex, good health and pro-choice information.

Gosh, people are so ignorant when it comes to being pro-choice. PRO-CHOICE does NOT mean PRO-ABORTION!! It means: keep the damn government out of my uterus and let me make my own decisions! Whether or not you are an individual that would get an abortion because: a. you don't want children b. are raped c. don't have the financial stability or not at a place in your life to raise a child..you can still believe every woman has the right to make their own decision. AND for all of those that think Planned Parenthood = abortion clinic...WRONG! The one I work for doesn't even perform them. They are only at select locations and it's not like "boom, it's gone!," they present the patient with all their options and guide them through counseling before and after. 94% of Planned Parenthood's services have NOTHING to do with the "Big A." They want women and men to be in good health and love the way they want, safely. They are an organization about prevention. Yeah, so i'm on a rant now...but seriously...people need to know their facts...especially with the election coming up in a couple of weeks. Issues are important!

Well, off to rehearsal I go :)

Late night ramblings

so i woke up about half an hour ago...it's now 1:25am. for whatever reason, i decided to get on my laptop...so far it's been uneventful, but i didn't feel i could sleep. at least i feel better. i remember getting off the phone and going to bed at 10:30 with a headache and the feeling i was going to see my dinner again...!
enough grossness for one post..

so i was reading my cousin Valarie's blog about how she met her future husband. adorable! naturally, it makes me think of Alex :) so we're moving in together after i graduate...which is now in 7 months and 2 days. i'm really excited! Alex is my best friend and the only person i can be my total self with. i'm so glad he puts up with my shenanigans :) but the point is, he's wonderful and i'm never letting him go without a fight. living with him will be wonderful!! i'll never have to whine about being far away again. see we've been dating since January 4, 2008 but i'm 3 hours away at school. it's really not too bad though; makes me appreciate our time and so far the longest i've had to go without seeing him was 3 weeks. it could be worse. he's coming in this weekend! with Dakota (his dog)! she's my baby :) he's so good to me and i can't wait to share a bed with him permanently. and a garage. and all the other fun stuff.

i love him. he's the one.

The first of many

hello. it's a friday afternoon and i can't stand to be awake --but i know i have to. too many things to do. sleep is for the weak!

anyway, i'm starting this little blog here. maybe it'll help me release those so called "toxins" from my mind. i don't know why i didn't start one sooner...i'm a journalism major for chist's sake..i have more than enough to write about.

so i'm in one of those slumps of not really wanting to do anything when you have everything in the world to do. i take on way too much responsibility, but it's my own way of preparing myself for the future. i want a good job. i want to be impressive. i don't think it's working. but i guess running the roads all day long from this meeting to this rehearsal to this event is better than being bored and lonely. although, everyone needs a bit of bored and lonely in their life. i have been feeling a tad lonely just surely not bored. my boyfriend's long distance and ever since i quit my sorority i haven't been surrounded by many friends. isn't it ridiculous how you can lose contact with someone who lives 5 minutes away? or in the next building at your apartment complex? then that brings the age-old saying that it takes two to make a relationship work. well, my defense to that is i'm too damn tired to exert any energy on socializing...lol. so it can be said all i really need in my life right now is some energy! can i borrow some from you?

well i'm off to "enjoy" the rest of my mildly packed schedule and lackluster social life. farewell.